Hey Inilah Sebenarnya Lelaki
Monday, April 29, 2013
Assalamualaikum semua.
Penganggur tegar. Itulah kerja aku
sekarang. Rasa tak berguna langsung. Wait. Sangat berguna pada pandangan parent
aku. Mengambil adik-adik dari sekolah. Err. Nak cari kerja, bapak aku suruh hold
sampai bulan 6. Eh punca? Entah. Dia nak kasi aku berehat kot. Hahahaha. Lelaki
lagi? Ala aku tau ramai yang suka. Ala suka lettew. Kalau tak memang korang tak
lah kan tengah baca entry aku ni kan sambil makan keropok poni. Aku boleh trace
tau! Haha.
Musim silih berganti, namun bukan pendirian
seorang lelaki. Sangat tidak dinafikan kaum lelaki suka menyembunyikan sesuatu.
Cukup pantang biarkan ego dia orang di ketahui oleh perempuan. Alasan pulak
berlambak sampai kalau lah ia kertas, kita boleh kumpul then boleh jual kat
apek surat khabar lama lol. Beribu alasan akan mereka lontarkan. To those yang
ada boyz boyz tu, lets find out the facts dan misteri seorang lelaki dalam
sesuatu hubungan.
***
“You, you tengah buat apa tuh?” atau
“Awak dah makan ke?” itu memang soalan lazim mereka untuk memulakan perbualan.
Ini adalah satu teknik wajib lelaki untuk membuangkan rasa terketa’-keta’
ketika berbicara dengan korang.
Lelaki sangat sangat suka perempuan yang
cantik, tapi tak semua yang excited dan struggle untuk mendekati perempuan itu
sebab bagi mereka, mereka hanya suka tengok-tengok je. Cuci mata. Macam
perempuan juga. HOH.
Lelaki akan lebih terpikat dengan perempuan yang ‘jual mahal’ sebab bagi mereka
lebih mencabar. Jangan jual terlampau mahal nanti dia orang bla. Aku tak tahu. K bai.
Lelaki boleh ambil masa beberapa minit je
untuk suka seseorang perempuan tu. Jangan terkejut dia orang juga boleh lupakan
seseorang dengan sekelip mata je. Senang cerita, dia akan ingat benda yang penting tapi
bukan pada yang tak penting. Dia ingat
nama janda yang jual goreng pisang kat selekoh jalan tu? Makcik goreng
pisang pun kau nak jeles? Dah dia dok hari-hari beli konfem lah dia ingat lol.
Walaupun dalam keadaan cemas dan tegang dia
orang sentiasa berlagak cool dan tenang dan poyo untuk menghadapinya. Padahal
dalam hati jantung macam nak pecah. So kalau korang nak tahu setakat mana
jantungnya nak meletup, cer tengok dia ni berpeluh ke tak. Ahaha.
Benda
yang dianggap penting bagi aku, hati-hati ketika menghantar pesanan SMS pada
seorang lelaki, in case kalau korang hantar pesanan yang tak lengkap mereka
akan terus ‘jump into the conclusion’. Bahaya bahaya ni.
Mereka sangat berharap mempunyai seorang
kekasih hati yang boleh dijadikan sebagai ‘geng kamcing’ mereka juga. Macam
sekepala. So apa-apa benda pun benda nak buat tak dek lah gadoh. Sorang nak
ajak pergi Zoo Negara. Yang sorang lagi ajak pergi Muzium Negara. Memang tak
lah. Boring gilew kapel ni. Ahaha.
Pernahkah anda di ngorat oleh lelaki?
Kena kacau ke apa ke. Haha. Lelaki memang nakal. Ya dan gatal. Ni serious. Sometimes we can
called it as ‘ulat bulu naik daun’. Tapi di sebalik kenakalan mereka ni, bila berhadapan
dengan wanita idaman mereka hah amek kaw terdiam dan membisu seribu bahasa.
Ketar lutut terus. Percayalah!
Lelaki lebih suka meminta nasihat dan
pandangan daripada kaum sejenisnya iaitu lelaki. PONDAN? Itu kes lain.
Perempuan ni hanya tempat untuk meluahkan isi hati dan rasa. Tapi ada jugak
lelaki yang kind of berkawan dengan perempuan, I mean BFF dengan perempuan,
akan cerita dan minta nasihat.
Jika korang kata TIDAK pada lelaki,
mereka tidak akan terus berputus asa. Bukan perkataan TIDAK yang dia orang
dengar tetapi, hey cuba cuba cuba lah lagi!
Jika lelaki kata dia gagal mengenali
kami itu bermakna dia nak cakap yang dia ni tak sekepala dengan korang.
Lelaki suka seorang perempuan yang
kelakar, happening, spontan, dan agak kalam kabut (in a good way) sebab bagi mereka
perempuan seperti ini comel dan boleh membuatkan hatinya sentiasa tercuit.
Cute macam saya tak??
Lelaki lebih cerewet dalam memilih pasangan hidup. So doesn't mean you are with him over ten years, secara confirmnya kau akan kahwin dengan dia. Bercinta bagai nak rak tapi terputus di tengah jalan. Itulah yang kita panggil jodoh.
Hang tengok Masterchef selebriti kat Astro? Nampak tak gelagat Zain dengan Cekta?
Menyampah? Haha. Itu lantak depa lah. Ya. Lelaki lebih tertarik dengan perempuan yang jauh lebih tua daripadanya ketika mereka berusia 23 tahun ke atas kerana sewaktu itu mereka mula fikir tentang sesuatu hubungan yang lebih serius berbanding biasa.
Menyampah? Haha. Itu lantak depa lah. Ya. Lelaki lebih tertarik dengan perempuan yang jauh lebih tua daripadanya ketika mereka berusia 23 tahun ke atas kerana sewaktu itu mereka mula fikir tentang sesuatu hubungan yang lebih serius berbanding biasa.
Jika lelaki itu suka mengusik korang sehingga
adakalanya membuatkan kamu tersipu-sipu malu shy shy cat itu bermakna si dia suka korang aww!
Korang boleh menguji kesetiaan dan keikhlasan seorang lelaki, disebabkan mereka ni gatal tak pasal tapi tapi dan tapi, jangan
berterusan dan berlarutan kerana lama kelamaan mereka akan mula hilang minat
dengan korang. Dengan erti kata lain, saya dah muak dengan perangai awak ni. Baik kita putus. K bai!
Untuk pengetahuan korang, lelaki akan menjadi singa dan tiger pun boleh bila bersama keluarga dan kawan-kawan tetapi bila dengan girlprend mereka akan terus bertukar menjadi ‘kucing’ yang paling jinak dan manja.
Hari ni kita nak makan kat mana sayanggsss??
Sekirannya si awak dijadikan sebagai tempat
mengadu nasib tentang hubungan dengan kekasih hatinya yang tak berkesudahan percayalah, selepas
sahaja dia memutuskan hubungan awak pasti akan dijadikan sebagai penganti!
Kerana mereka akan tertarik dengan sikap penyabar dan keikhlasan awak berkawan
dengannya.
*Tu diaa. Ayat skema dah klua' dah. Sangat lah tidak sesuai dengan aku ayat ni*
*Tu diaa. Ayat skema dah klua' dah. Sangat lah tidak sesuai dengan aku ayat ni*
***
Apabila difikirkan balik, whoah lelaki ni banyak perangai dan ragam. Kalaulah apa yang aku tulis ni terkena dekat muka sendiri, jangan pulak korang tuduh aku usha hidup korang. Aku tahu aku ni mengaggur. Tak dek feel dengan lelaki? Kau ni normal tak?? Ahaha. Kenapa aku single? Ala rilek lah babe.
You’ll meet someone
soon. No one knows what’s round the corner.
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