Hey Inilah Sebenarnya Lelaki

Monday, April 29, 2013


Assalamualaikum semua.


Penganggur tegar. Itulah kerja aku sekarang. Rasa tak berguna langsung. Wait. Sangat berguna pada pandangan parent aku. Mengambil adik-adik dari sekolah. Err. Nak cari kerja, bapak aku suruh hold sampai bulan 6. Eh punca? Entah. Dia nak kasi aku berehat kot. Hahahaha. Lelaki lagi? Ala aku tau ramai yang suka. Ala suka lettew. Kalau tak memang korang tak lah kan tengah baca entry aku ni kan sambil makan keropok poni. Aku boleh trace tau! Haha.


Musim silih berganti, namun bukan pendirian seorang lelaki. Sangat tidak dinafikan kaum lelaki suka menyembunyikan sesuatu. Cukup pantang biarkan ego dia orang di ketahui oleh perempuan. Alasan pulak berlambak sampai kalau lah ia kertas, kita boleh kumpul then boleh jual kat apek surat khabar lama lol. Beribu alasan akan mereka lontarkan. To those yang ada boyz boyz tu, lets find out the facts dan misteri seorang lelaki dalam sesuatu hubungan.



***

“You, you tengah buat apa tuh?” atau “Awak dah makan ke?” itu memang soalan lazim mereka untuk memulakan perbualan. Ini adalah satu teknik wajib lelaki untuk membuangkan rasa terketa’-keta’ ketika berbicara dengan korang.

Lelaki sangat sangat suka perempuan yang cantik, tapi tak semua yang excited dan struggle untuk mendekati perempuan itu sebab bagi mereka, mereka hanya suka tengok-tengok je. Cuci mata. Macam perempuan juga. HOH.

       Lelaki akan lebih terpikat dengan perempuan yang ‘jual mahal’ sebab bagi mereka lebih mencabar. Jangan jual terlampau mahal nanti dia orang bla. Aku tak tahu. K bai.

Lelaki boleh ambil masa beberapa minit je untuk suka seseorang perempuan tu. Jangan terkejut dia orang juga boleh lupakan seseorang dengan sekelip mata je. Senang cerita, dia akan ingat benda yang penting tapi bukan pada yang tak penting. Dia ingat nama janda yang jual goreng pisang kat selekoh jalan tu? Makcik goreng pisang pun kau nak jeles? Dah dia dok hari-hari beli konfem lah dia ingat lol.



Walaupun dalam keadaan cemas dan tegang dia orang sentiasa berlagak cool dan tenang dan poyo untuk menghadapinya. Padahal dalam hati jantung macam nak pecah. So kalau korang nak tahu setakat mana jantungnya nak meletup, cer tengok dia ni berpeluh ke tak. Ahaha.
  
       Benda yang dianggap penting bagi aku, hati-hati ketika menghantar pesanan SMS pada seorang lelaki, in case kalau korang hantar pesanan yang tak lengkap mereka akan terus ‘jump into the conclusion’. Bahaya bahaya ni. 


Mereka sangat berharap mempunyai seorang kekasih hati yang boleh dijadikan sebagai ‘geng kamcing’ mereka juga. Macam sekepala. So apa-apa benda pun benda nak buat tak dek lah gadoh. Sorang nak ajak pergi Zoo Negara. Yang sorang lagi ajak pergi Muzium Negara. Memang tak lah. Boring gilew kapel ni. Ahaha.

Pernahkah anda di ngorat oleh lelaki? Kena kacau ke apa ke. Haha. Lelaki memang nakal. Ya dan gatal. Ni serious. Sometimes we can called it as ‘ulat bulu naik daun’. Tapi di sebalik kenakalan mereka ni, bila berhadapan dengan wanita idaman mereka hah amek kaw terdiam dan membisu seribu bahasa. Ketar lutut terus. Percayalah!

Lelaki lebih suka meminta nasihat dan pandangan daripada kaum sejenisnya iaitu lelaki. PONDAN? Itu kes lain. Perempuan ni hanya tempat untuk meluahkan isi hati dan rasa. Tapi ada jugak lelaki yang kind of berkawan dengan perempuan, I mean BFF dengan perempuan, akan cerita dan minta nasihat.

Jika korang kata TIDAK pada lelaki, mereka tidak akan terus berputus asa. Bukan perkataan TIDAK yang dia orang dengar tetapi, hey cuba cuba cuba lah lagi!

Jika lelaki kata dia gagal mengenali kami itu bermakna dia nak cakap yang dia ni tak sekepala dengan korang.

Lelaki suka seorang perempuan yang kelakar, happening, spontan, dan agak kalam kabut (in a good way) sebab bagi mereka perempuan seperti ini comel dan boleh membuatkan hatinya sentiasa tercuit.

Cute macam saya tak??

   Lelaki lebih cerewet dalam memilih pasangan hidup. So doesn't mean you are with him over ten years, secara confirmnya kau akan kahwin dengan dia. Bercinta bagai nak rak tapi terputus di tengah jalan. Itulah yang kita panggil jodoh.

Hang tengok Masterchef selebriti kat Astro? Nampak tak gelagat Zain dengan Cekta? 
 Menyampah? Haha. Itu lantak depa lah. Ya. Lelaki lebih tertarik dengan perempuan yang jauh lebih tua daripadanya ketika mereka berusia 23 tahun ke atas kerana sewaktu itu mereka mula fikir tentang sesuatu hubungan yang lebih serius berbanding biasa.

Jika lelaki itu suka mengusik korang sehingga adakalanya membuatkan kamu tersipu-sipu malu shy shy cat itu bermakna si dia suka korang aww!

 Korang boleh menguji kesetiaan dan keikhlasan seorang lelaki, disebabkan mereka ni gatal tak pasal tapi tapi dan tapi, jangan berterusan dan berlarutan kerana lama kelamaan mereka akan mula hilang minat dengan korang. Dengan erti kata lain, saya dah muak dengan perangai awak ni. Baik kita putus. K bai!

Untuk pengetahuan korang, lelaki akan menjadi singa dan tiger pun boleh bila bersama keluarga dan kawan-kawan tetapi bila dengan girlprend mereka akan terus bertukar menjadi ‘kucing’ yang paling jinak dan manja.

Hari ni kita nak makan kat mana sayanggsss??

Sekirannya si awak dijadikan sebagai tempat mengadu nasib tentang hubungan dengan kekasih hatinya yang tak berkesudahan percayalah, selepas sahaja dia memutuskan hubungan awak pasti akan dijadikan sebagai penganti! Kerana mereka akan tertarik dengan sikap penyabar dan keikhlasan awak berkawan dengannya.
 *Tu diaa. Ayat skema dah klua' dah. Sangat lah tidak sesuai dengan aku ayat ni*

***

Apabila difikirkan balik, whoah lelaki ni banyak perangai dan ragam. Kalaulah apa yang aku tulis ni terkena dekat muka sendiri, jangan pulak korang tuduh aku usha hidup korang. Aku tahu aku ni mengaggur. Tak dek feel dengan lelaki? Kau ni normal tak?? Ahaha. Kenapa aku single? Ala rilek lah babe.


You’ll meet someone soon. No one knows what’s round the corner.




Rindu zaman belajar dulu! .







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komen je. Tak kena bayar pun. OHOHO